Do you or someone close have a problem reaching orgasm? How frustrating! Orgasm is perhaps the most pleasurable and complete bodily sensation that someone can feel. Unfortunately, there is a condition called anorgasmia. This is basically the inability to reach orgasm, even if there is sexual stimulation and even enough time to reach it.
Although there are different degrees of anorgasmia, which depend on the frequency with which it occurs, it is usually divided into 2 types: Primary and secondary anorgasmia. The primary is one that appears congenitally or permanently, that is, has never reached an orgasm, and is more common in women than men, with about 5% of the population suffering for it. It is thought by doctors, psychologists and sociologists that this may be due to a lack of appropriate stimulation, or because of a psychological block when considering female sexuality as impure, dirty or unpleasant, a remnant of the Victorian era and its repression that nowadays it still exists in many societies and in religious circles.
Secondary anorgasmia is the one in which the person has lost the ability to have orgasms or they have reduced their intensity. It is mainly associated with alcoholism, melancholic sadness, depression, pelvic surgery such as hysterectomy, certain medications, lack of estrogen in menopause, chronic fatigue, or rape. In the case of men, prostatectomy is usually the main cause for secondary anorgasmia, since when the prostate is operated the peripheral nerves that support the sexual response are easily damaged. It is also called retarded ejaculation in men.
The first diagnosis and recommended treatment is by psychological route, since most of it is usually associated with it. Once this route has been exhausted, you can proceed to do more extensive tests to find the physiological root. Diabetic neuropathy, genital mutilation, multiple sclerosis, genital surgery, pelvic trauma, hormonal imbalances, spinal cord injuries, among others, can be considerable causes. Another very important is the use of a certain type of antidepressant.
When it is possible to reach orgasm in certain occasions and in others it is not called situational anorgasmia and it is totally normal. There are different circumstances that create lack of sensitivity, stress, partners, time of day, posture, among others may be the cause. We must also consider the situation of the relationship. For example, if there are unresolved conflicts, lack of communication about sexual needs, violence, lack of trust, or simply lack of connection, attraction or love, this may impact your orgasmic capacity.
On the other hand there is the ejaculatory anhedonia, a situation in which ejaculation does occur without the pleasant orgasmic sensation that accompanies it. This occurs mainly in men, and the causes are very similar to those of anorgasmia. Other possible are the inability to secrete or process dopamine due to physiological causes or a psychiatric medication; Excess vitamin B6, low testosterone, and high levels of prolactin. The psychological treatment as well as the use of oxytocin are the most common to solve the problem.
To a large extent these problems are drastically improved by addressing psychological causes. The sexual history itself is quite important, and it is vital to give it space, time and a lot of love to transcend it. We all deserve to feel that wonderful explosion that fills us with joy and pleasure. Breaking the silence and talking about it is an indispensable step. If there is a lot of confidentiality on the part of your partner in this regard, transmit the confidence and acceptance required to express it.