The atmosphere is electrifying, the body is on and the kisses are warming each cell, fanning the flame and melting our shields. We feel confident, light, passionate. Until you touch that place or you say a word ... Auch ... You touched the forbidden fiber. Your lover tenses or even moves away. "We'd better stop here."
We have all gone through that. We do not know what bothers you or the trauma or unpleasant past experience that comes out to the light with touch. Each person has certain different tastes, and certain dislikes as well. An uncomfortable or unpleasant sexual experience can be avoided with a simple question: Is there any part of your body you wont like me to touch? In that sense you will feel safe to play and enjoy.
The reality is that more than one person will be scared to tell you what they don’t like. We want validation and feel uncomfortable opening so quickly to share our deepest intimacies. To be able t do that is important to create a space of trust and openness before entering the most intimate space of the other, Opening yourself first before the other person opens up. Deep communication begins with my capacity to be relaxed and feel safe.
There is nothing better than open communication specially about sex. For many it’s natural, but in general we still don’t talk about sex. Try it! Share your wants and your boundaries and sex will always feel much better.