Prevent stupid fights with your partner
By: yorgasmicNovember 14, 2018Views: 116

“Who do you think you are? You're an idiot! "Phrases that tend to start a fight between two people. One speaks an offense and the other feels attacked and reacts in the same way triggering an unpleasant situation.

 It is very rare and valuable to find someone who can "stand aside" and listen to the other objectively, without taking it personally. Listening and realizing that the other person has a story, probably painful, for which his or her reaction happens. It’s to see someone going through a personal process and that is "vomiting" their bitterness, sadness or anxiety towards us. Then we can see it with neutrality and stop feeling that their attack is towards us. Then we can stop reacting and we are able to handle the situation calmly, not taking it personally.

 

A famous story of buddha is that in one occasion someone came to attack him, weapon in hand. When he saw him, calmly, he said, "I see you are aggressive, but I do not receive it." Not taking personal attacks prevents us from causing harm. So the next time someone attacks you, realize that it is their own person whom they are attacking. Of course, if it’s someone who does it continuously you can ask for help. Don’t receive a verbal attack that is not about you. "He who gets angry loses" and we lose our own peace.

 


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